Squeamish about having sex while on your period? You're not alone. No matter how much your body wants to get it on — you can thank an end-of-cycle hormone spike for that — you can still find yourself getting clit-blocked by common anxieties about mixing sex and menstruation. Don't let these outdated taboos prevent you from experiencing some of the most intense, mind-blowing orgasms of your entire life?
It's time to get real about period sex, and #LubeLife is here to help with this how-to guide.
Go With The Flow
Let's start this guide with a little refresher course on what's actually happening during your period. Once every 28-ish days (if you're not pregnant), your uterus does a complete refresh. The cells and blood that line the wall of your uterus are "sloughed" off, revealing a new layer of healthy cells underneath. Your body does a bunch of other stuff to speed this process along — that's what's up with all the cramps and hormone-induced need for cookie-dough ice cream — but that's the basic version.
Your vagina and uterus are both perfectly fine throughout this entire process. There's not even an increased risk of getting a UTI or other infection from having sex during your period. There's absolutely nothing unhealthy or dangerous about having sex during menstruation. (Quick note: It's definitely possible to get pregnant while on your period, so stick to your normal birth control and safe sex practices.)
That said, your vulva and vagina may be a little more sensitive during your period, but that's not a bad thing. In fact, many women report that this increased sensitivity only increases their sex drive. That can make it much easier to get hot and bothered, and easily result in off-the-chart orgasms. Given that menstruation typically lasts from 3 to 7 days, that's a lot of mind-blowing orgasms you could be missing out on.
Period Sex Has Big Benefits
Let's not overlook the fact that periods can also suck. It's not easy to feel sexy when your entire body feels swollen and achy. If you're skeptical that the miracle cure to all the cramps, soreness, and headaches is lots and lots of orgasms, that's OK. Just don't knock it until you've tried it.
One of the big reasons that orgasms feel so good is that they prompt your body to release oxytocin (AKA "the love hormone"), as well as a flood of pain-relieving and cramp-easing endorphins. This doesn't stop just because Aunt Flo is in town. That's something to keep in mind before you down a handful of ibuprofen.
Plenty of women also report heightened feelings of stress and anxiety during their periods. If only there was a simple way to naturally reduce stress … Oh wait! Getting laid, or at least doing a little solo vibe play, could be just the thing you need.
Periods Can Make You Extra Horny
Around 30% of women report being more aroused during their periods. If you're one of these lucky women, you can thank spiking levels of libido-increasing hormones like testosterone and progesterone for making your genitals a little more sensitive than normal. When the volume is turned up on all your favorite lady bits, it can be hard to ignore that extra stimulation.
This increase in sensitivity may also be why plenty of women also report experiencing more intense orgasms during their time of the month. All this extra chemistry can turn even the most humble crotch sneeze into a body-shaking climax. If you're already horny, why not make the most of it?
Worried About Your Partner? Talk It Out
Worried that your partner will be too icked out by your monthly cycle to bang you? Chances are that you're overthinking it. Most men aren't all that worried about having sex with you during your period, and they certainly won't see it as a deal breaker. If your partner is a woman, odds are that she'll be even more receptive. After all, what's the big deal? Period sex is just regular sex with a few minor changes.
Not sure how to get this conversation started? You don't need to be subtle. Even something truly blunt — "I'm on my period, but I'm also really horny. Let's go to bed." — can be all you need to set things in motion.
Going Down Is A Great Start
For obvious reasons, period sex tends to be a little less spontaneous and carefree than regular sex. As a result, it may take a bit more time to get in the mood. Why not take this opportunity to give your partner a little oral incentive? This is the perfect time to practice your head game, using your mouth and tongue to tease them right to the brink.
Now is also a perfect time to elevate your foreplay skills. Break out your favorite sex toys, play with blindfolds and restraints (if that's your thing), or lube up your partner's fingers and let them explore. Any and all of your foreplay favorites should be on the table. The more turned on you both become, the less either of you will mind seeing a few random drops of blood once things really get going.
Bring A Towel
If there's one essential rule to easing your mind about period sex, it's putting down a towel first. This stain-preventing innovation allows you to have as many earth-shattering orgasms as you like without having to worry about staining the sheets. When you're done, just toss it in the washing machine.
While any towel will work, size does matter here. Ideally, you want to use a large, dark beach towel for this particular task. Thicker is probably better, but it really doesn't make that much of a difference.
The Red Tide Is No Match For Shower Sex
Want to sidestep the possibility of dealing with red smudges entirely? Try shagging in the shower. Any menstrual blood will go right down the drain. Plus, you'll both be refreshingly clean at the end. That said, shower sex comes with its own set of safety considerations, as there's nothing erotic about slipping and hurting yourself in the bath. Standing sex positions require a little more endurance than the horizontal kind, and it can also be tricky to find the right position. Have fun, but be careful.
Lube Is A Lifesaver
Although plenty of people claim that menstrual blood "acts as a lubricant," this may be more wishful thinking than fact. Periods do strange things to a woman's vaginal microbiome, including making it more difficult to produce natural lubrication. The obvious solution to this problem is to keep a bottle of high-quality lube around during period sex.
Even if you don't need it every time, it won't hurt to have a bottle of your favorite lube on your bedside table. It's also essential that you avoid oil or petroleum based lubes, as these have a nasty habit of trapping bacteria in the vagina. Stick to silicone or water-based lubes instead.
If you have sex during your period, there's going to be a little blood. It's not a big deal to clean up, but you'll definitely want to keep a box of wet wipes or damp washcloth nearby. This allows you to wipe down your hands and other parts, keeping the mess to a minimum until you can give everything a proper rinse.
There is always a risk of contracting a urinary tract infection after vaginal sex, and this is just as true for sex during menstruation. Peeing immedately after sex seems to significantly reduce this risk, so be sure to include this in your post-sex cleanup routine.
One of the biggest fears that women have about period sex is that their partner will be grossed out by the very idea. While those fears are likely overblown, there's no getting around the fact that some people are legitimately turned off by the sight of blood. For a woman that's just looking for a little cramp relief while getting her rocks off, this can be more than frustrating.
In that case, it's time for a little self love. Just follow the same basic preparation guidelines — lay down a dark towel, give jillin' in the shower a try, and don't skimp on the lube — to keep everything fun and stress free.
What If Period Sex Isn't An Option?
What if your partner is genuinely not interested — or even turned off — by the idea of having sex during your period? That's OK! They may need a little time to warm up to the concept, or it may be something they simply aren't capable of enjoying.
Don't force anything, but make it clear that you're going to have a pain-killing, stress-reducing, period-easing orgasm one way or another. If that means doing it yourself, so be it.
Remember: Period Sex Is Awesome
As we've tried to make clear throughout this guide, period sex really isn't a big deal. It's certainly not something that should cause you — not to mention your partner(s) — from missing out on several days' worth of orgasms every month. Sure, having sex during your period can be a little messy. So what? All sex is messy, and that shouldn't stop anyone from having a great time.