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By #LubeLife Team   |   December 12, 2020  

If you haven’t had much (or any) experience with anal sex, a whole new world of pleasure is about to open up for you.  Whether you’re gay, straight or somewhere in between, you may have some questions about backdoor action. From what it feels like to how to relax the anus, there is much more that goes into having anal sex than meets the eye. 

What does anal sex feel like?

Anal sex feels different depending on the person and the type of lubricant you use. Because the anus is filled with nerves, expect to feel strong sensations when a penis or sex toy is inserted. Also, the sensations can be more intense with a thicker penis or toy and with more thrusting.  These sensations can be painful, strong, and even euphoric. A rule of thumb when it comes to anal sex is that you should go to the speed and rhythm of the person receiving. Don’t make the mistake of following your favorite adult films by thinking a penis or sex toy can be jammed into a tight area with little to no caution. 

Does anal sex burn? 

If you're experiencing a burning sensation during anal sex, it can be an indication of a few things. The most common cause is that muscles surrounding the anus are not relaxed. In order to have the best anal sex experience, relaxed muscles are necessary. Another cause of burning could be the lubricant you chose. For anal sex, silicone based lubricants are the gold standard, but also high-quality water-based lubricants that have been designed for anal sex are ideal. Your lube should be strong enough to withstand the in and out action while still allowing for a smooth glide. At #LubeLife, our silicone lubricant or our water-based anal lubricant are the perfect balance you need to get things on in the bedroom. 

If you have sex without lube, does it hurt?

This depends on the person but in our experience, having anal sex without lube is not a good idea. The anus is not self-lubricating, meaning that it needs moisture of some kind during sex to ensure that its walls do not rip or suffer other damage. If you’re someone that has anal sex without lube and doesn’t feel any kind of pain, consider yourself the exception and not the rule. 



What are the best anal sex positions?

While this is also up to the individual, there are certain anal sex positions that are commonly used and should be explored. These positions include: 

  • Lying Doggy 
  • Backdoor Missionary 
  • The Caboose 
  • The Spoon 
  • Reverse Cowgirl 
  • Standing Doggy 
  • The Spork (we’ll let you figure that one out) 

Use your imagination when it comes to anal sex. The positions are endless. 

How does missionary anal sex work?

The missionary sex position is one of the easiest is to pull off. All that you have to do is have the bottom (receiver) lay on their back while relaxing their anus. The top (giver) can help with relaxation by using their tongue, fingers, toys, or other objects to relax and/or stretch out the area. Once the bottom is relaxed, the top stands between the bottom’s legs and inserts his penis into the anus. This position allows the pair to be eye to eye during intercourse. 



What is the adult sex toy, a butt plug, used for?

Adult sex toys are a great addition to anyone’s bedroom. When it comes to anal sex, toys and butt plugs can be used to help warm up the area before penetration. Like a car in winter, sometimes you need to let the fuel run for a few minutes before the car is able to be driven. Sex toys and butt plugs allow for the anus to feel more relaxed, helping the penis go in deeper and with ease.

Will my butt hurt after anal sex?

The causes for feelings of pain are ones that we’ve already gone over but it is worth revisiting. The pain you feel could be caused by an anus that is not relaxed enough or from not using a lubricant suited to withstand anal sex. If the pain doesn’t go away, make it a priority to visit a doctor. 



How do I get myself ready?

First, anal sex can sometimes be messy, so it’s important to clean yourself well beforehand to prevent any embarrassing moments.  Clean your butt thoroughly with an enema or a douche to make sure your butt is squeaky clean.  Second, watch your diet.  Don’t eat beans or other foods that might give you gas before having anal sex.  Third, start small.  If you’re inexperienced in the anal sex department, try experimenting with your fingers, a butt plug or a small adult toy to see what feels good and to help you relax on your own time.

How can I relax my anus for sex?

A great way to relax the anus for anal play is having your partner lick your butt.  The saliva will help moisten the area and it will help the bottom relax.  You might also try using sex toys. With some lube, use sex toys to warm up and stretch the anus. You'll also learn a lot about your partner based on their reaction to the toys. If you’re feeling extra frisky, use your fingers to get your partner hot and bothered. 

Do we need to use a condom?

HIV/AIDS and other STDs can be spread through anal sex.  So to be safe, you should definitely wear a condom.  However, if you’re in a committed monogamous relationship, then you and your partner may decide to go condomless.  Also, there is a fairly new drug regimen now available for HIV-negative men to prevent getting HIV/AIDS – called PREP.  The guidelines for PREP strongly recommend that you continue to use a condom during anal sex, even if you’re on the drug.  And if you are using a condom, even if it’s pre-lubricated, you will definitely need to use lube to help make it feel more natural.

Do women like anal play during oral sex?

This depends on the individual woman. Before having anal sex, you should have an open conversation with your partner to understand her comfort level with anal. There are some women who love it while others would rather get a root canal. Sex is about creating a happy and healthy environment for all. 



Is anal sex feel pleasurable?

Anal sex is an acquired taste, but can be extremely pleasurable. There are some people who love it the first time while there are others that need more stimulation and time before they grow to like it. If you don’t find anal sex pleasurable, understand that it is completely normal. Don’t beat yourself up about it and either choose to continue or find other methods to get yourself going. 



How can I have pain-free anal sex?

The short answer is: LUBE!! Lubricants give the anus moisture it needs to be able to withstand the in-and-out movement of the penis. Before you even think of inserting a penis into the anus, take time to warm it up. This prevents potential injuries and embarrassing doctor visits.  



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